Out of the Mouth of Babes

Tuesday, March 7, 2017

Today I'm sharing my personal version of kids say (& do) the darnedest things... because sometimes I wonder if this is really my life... 

// Baylor's been skipping his nap more recently, which is fine, as long as he has a "rest period" in his room. Yesterday, after he was quietly in his room for just over an hour, I went to check on him. As I opened the door, I noticed his pants, laying tangled on the floor, and him, naked from waste down, playing with his trucks. Me: "Baylor, what happened to your pants?" Him: "I had to pee!" Instantly assuming worst case, I asked him where he might of had an accident on the floor (which never happens, but kids, they always get you where you least expect it). He ever-so-nonchalantly handed me a ziploc bag FULL of pee. OMG. Me: "WHAT?! Where did you get this? Did you spill?!" Him: "No mom, I just dumped out some of my trucks ... you let me pee in a cup in the van at Chick-fil-a, what's the difference?" touche, buddy. 

 // While driving to pick up Baylor from preschool, I noticed Winnie's face covered in a white "substance" (in retrospect, I guess I should be thankful it wasn't brown) ... I immediately knew to ask the culprit what Winnie was eating to which she replied "wipstick". Winnie had eaten half of an EOS lip balm and proceeded to start gagging in the backseat and scratching her tongue. She survived, however the chap stick wasn't as fortunate.

// I told Baylor he needs to lay down in his bed for a nap, and he stood next to the bed, crossed his arms, and with a very disgruntled look, said "SO, how is this going to work? You have a tv, a bath tub and a sink in your room and I got nuffing. What am I supposed to do in here?" Poor guy hasn't quite figured out the pecking order around here ;) 

// Bellamy told Baylor this morning that she is "THE QUEEN" and that he must blow bubbles in her face when she walks by ... he looked at her like she was drunk and then smacked her on the ass when she walked by in her plastic heels and gaudy tutu. Again, pecking order.

Things we've shoved in our nose this month: gum, a LEGO guy's arm (this one took a bit of a surgeon's hand to remove) and peas. WHY with the peas?

It's a wonderful life :)

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Anonymous said...

I hate to be this person but....How do you edit your Instagram pictures?

Unknown said...

VSOcam! I'll do a post soon!

"B" said...

I love this! only bc we are going through the same things. Well some, currently only our girls are potty trained and my middle likes to put things in her ears? really how does that sound like fun, a suction apparatus and a doctor visit to remove items placed in the ears. I need to write this all down so I can read it back when I am sad and lonely in my old age!

Unknown said...

Haha yes! The ears & nose ought to have locks on them!

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